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I’m 19 years old (in college), extremely shy and unconfident. I have a hard time talking to people and dont talk at all when I’m in a group of more than 2 or 3 people. I know I have a fun personality, but I’m afraid of opening up and showing this fun side of me. Part of the reason is because I’m not confident and I’m also afraid that I might offend someone else (even though I dont have an offensive personality). I’ve also never had a boyfriend and I never ever flirt, not even if I like the guy. If a guy asks me out, I always say no because I feel like I will be an incompetent girlfriend and I am afraid of the heartbreak that will most likely (in my mind) happen.
I am really lonely, I have just a handful of not so close friends, I’m often the one who sits in the corner and thinks everyone hates me (even though people are probably not as friendly with me because I’m not open with them), and I would really like to be able to open up, especially with guys that I like.
I know a lot of these problems (if not all) come from my upbringing. My family, including all of my sisters, are very uptight and get offended over anything. They also get mad at tiny things that other people would find normal/funny/cute (this is probably why I’m afraid to be fun around people because I dont want to make them angry.) I have always been isolated, I was never allowed to hang out with friends while I was growing up (now that I’m away at college I’m more exposed to people my age outside of the classroom setting, but I dont know how to just hang out). My family has also criticized me about everything. Although they are right about a lot of things, I think they made a big deal out of them and just ruined my self esteem. My parents have also taught me that all guys cheat and have made me afraid of dating (although they have always just assumed that dating for me would ALWAYS be out of the question, so i have no idea what couples that date do).
Oh and I also have no talents and no hobbies because my parents never thought it was necessary for me to do anything. This doesnt help my confidence when people around me are good at sports, music, theater, etc. and all i say I do is “watch tv.” (I’ll fix this though! i’ll take on activities and hobbies that i’ve always wanted to do).
The point is, while I know where my emotional issues come from, and I know that my family’s attutide and view on life are totally wrong, this has been my life for 19 years and it is so ingrained in my brain and it’s hard for me to be comfortable around people. Is it too late for me or is there a way for me to actually be happy and let loose?
Oh and I’m still a person with high morals. I dont want to sleep around or get crazy drunk every weekend. I want to be outgoing and comfortable without doing these things.
EXCUSE MY MISTAKE I WaS REFFERING TO HIM NOT YOU ..I MISSUSE THE PRONOUN “”YOUR”” INSTEAD OF “”HE””” I APOLOGIZED madaraxkohtamilss lol
no its real smoke
and now my house is virtually fogged
i’m sueing and i want a refund
-_-‘ that is soooo lame
Got this CD..
It knocks me out everytime!
This music reminds me of your mom
Oh and hyperactive7, I will knock you out.
excellent for studying
i am suffocating to much smoke oxygen please to late i’m dead
the roof the roof the roof is on fire burn burn let the motherf….. burn
burn motherf… burn but in this case i guess is the table maybe
I loved watching the smoke. It was so relaxing. Excellent visual!
hahah dat one is funny:)
The smoke reminds me of the nice scent
from the incense my grandma burns every morning 😀 [for praying]
I found you by accident….but i’m so glad I did.
now this is nice and relaxing 🙂 beautifull, thank you
I like it !!!
i like it !!!
Thankyou for this very relaxing video, I love the roses, A flower of love and beauty, When God made flowers he must have had love in mind, Can you imagine How beautiful heaven must be with all this loving music we are all blessed with, How Divine, Thankyou for a minute off peace and tranquility, Heaven Sent from Joy 10/10************
Thank you so much! Such a wonderful channel!!
wow, very relaxing and hipnozing to watch te smoke!
I LOVE U SO MUCH POSITIVE CHILLOUT
this really calms…:) thank you!
awesome, thank you !!!
God, I feel so much better now. I was about to kick someones teeth in, this vids saved that girls teeth.
I love your musik
@QueenyofHearts86 u need help