The effects of adultery can prove to be quite challenging to the individual that suffers from them. There are many different definitions when it comes to the term “adultery”. However, the most common definition is that it is an act and violation of the marriage vows. When an individual engages in a sexual act of any kind outside the marriage, that person is said to be an “adulterer”. While this is often referred to as “adultery”, there are other names by which it is known. Infidelity and extramarital sex are examples of other names in which this is known by. Here, you will be provided with information pertaining to the effects of adultery.
There are a number of negative consequences that result when someone commits adultery.
Adultery: Consequences and Knowing About it
There are areas in the world in which legal action is pursued as a criminal act. An example of this type of area is Taiwan. In many instances, when an individual has been a victim of their spouse’s adulterous acts, they are issued immediate permission to divorce that individual. As you can see, this is not an uncommon issue. However, when experienced, it can be an absolute disheartening experience for all that are involved. Below are some more examples when it comes to the effects of adultery:
1. Individuals who engage in sexual acts with someone outside of their marriage, often experience high levels of anxiety and depression once this has been indulged in. This level of stress not only impacts the mind in a psychological way; it also affects the physiological make up and parts of the person.
2. By engaging in this act, one may start to experience difficulties in relationships, work, school, and many other areas.
3. Many who have pursued an adulterous relationship have often found themselves suffering financial loss as a result of the relationship that is being pursued.
4. In many professional positions, there is a possibility for termination of employment if the adulterous act was brought to the attention of the employer. An example of when this act may cost a professional loss is law enforcement positions. These are professionals who are expected to achieve the highest level of integrity and it is believed to be a break down of character if adultery is committed. Being a pastor and head of a religious denomination may also line up for dismissal if adultery is committed.
5. When an adulterous act is committed, and others find out, a lack of respect and tolerance may be experienced. This can be potentially devastating.
Let us come to moot point, do you have a hunch that your partner is cheating on you? Can you tell that he is really cheating on you? How can you tell that he is cheating on you? In a relationship, you can’t help but doubt your partner every time he acts strange or different. You may think that he is cheating on you. A cheating partner can easily be detected.
There are sure signs that you will know he is cheating on you. Are you clueless as to what those signs are?
Signs to Know Your Partner is Cheating on You
Here’s a list of signs that he is cheating on you. These are just signs, it would be good if you catch him red-handed.
Sign #1: Your partner has cheated on you in the past
A cheating partner is similar to a drug addict. Even though he has gone rehab and changed for a quite some time, there’s a chance that he will still get back to his own act. Likewise, same goes for a cheating partner. You have to know get to know your partner. Ask him if he has been unfaithful in his past relationships. After all, you do have the right to know these things. You have to openly talk about infidelity with your boyfriend or spouse. Both of you should know that you are on the same page. If he did cheat before, do not automatically judge him. Don’t conclude that he is cheating on you as well. You have to consider other signs as well.
Sign #2: Your instincts tell you differently
There’s what you call a woman’s instinct. If you feel that your partner is unfaithful to you, go with your gut instinct. It’s this little feeling that will get your attention that something is definitely right. Often times, when people stick to their gut instinct, they are right. Just make sure that you don’t accuse your partner right away that he his unfaithful to you. This feeling will drive you to investigate things. Don’t take this feeling for granted.
Sign #3: He goes home late
He calls you up and tells you that he won’t be able to make it for dinner. He says he’s going home late because of his work. Another night, he calls you and tells you that he would be going home late because he and his buddies are going out. And you begin to notice, it happens every so often. Most of the time, he comes home late. You now have to worry because he may be spending more time with his lover than you.
Sign #4: He gets mad if you question him
Every time you ask him where he is heading to, he raises his voice. It seems like he is being defensive. He turns into a raging mode. He gets irritated and gets annoyed with your questions. When he turns into a monster, it means he is hiding something from you. After all, why would he be mad if he has got nothing to hide? Just remember to confront him in a gentle manner.
The flip side, if you are cheating on him after knowing he did commit adultery before, remember never to confess openly without knowing his nature and end up affair amicably.
Why to Never Confess Adultery
I almost burst into tears on the treadmill at the gym. Two women, clawing at each other, pulling one another’s hair — on national television. I remember the feeling of outing myself as the ashamed adulteress.
My heart broke for these women, believing that each was acting on a deep hurt, not a deliberate deviancy. Hateful words oozed from their mouths like puss from infected wounds: wounded hearts in need of healing, not the hyena-like laughter of the on-looking audience.
There they were: confessing their adultery on television — as entertainment at their expense. That’s not the way I’d recommend resolving an affair. In fact, to this day I haven’t confronted the wife of the man with whom I was involved for six months.
I can’t advise you on how to handle your situation, but I can say from my experience why I didn’t confess to him that I cheated:
I knew it was more for my benefit than his good. I knew my heart’s motive, if I had confronted him then. And that motive would have been a selfish one: to have him forgive me so I could feel like less of a bad person. I would have wanted him to put his pain aside so I could have peace.
I didn’t know how much he knew. My confessions are mine, and though I know there were points that he suspected something, it wasn’t certain that he knew I was having an affair. An affair that had even reached the point of thinking of leaving him.
It wasn’t up to me, in my human judgment, to decide when I thought he needed to know. Or to decide it was time for him to confess, by confessing his involvement with me. Instead, I ended the affair. To this day, I believe that is the best way of apologizing. Of course in word, if presented with the opportunity at the right time, but above all in deed.
To end the affair is to finally set your selfishness aside.
The best apology is to give the best chance for reconciliation, when the truth does finally come out. And for him to have that best chance, is for you to get out of the way. For you submit to his sacred role – whether you agree with him being the one in that role or not.
In general scenarios, you can’t control them, you can’t control if partner cheats again (with someone new, which is possible, without repentance and help). You can’t control if she forgives him and they stay together after all. It’s not even your responsibility to make sure they do end up alright. Sometimes knowing general situations and putting into other person’s position help in opening up mind for a better solution.
But it is your responsibility to do what’s best. I know there are probably times when you feel like being an adulteress is you at your worst — but you have the chance to still do what’s best. The best for others is also best for you.